Monday, 25 April 2016

Accepting the Unchangeable || S3P2 || Motivational Monday


Aloha Sprinklerinos,

Merry Monday to you. The start of a new week and a chance to wipe the slate clean and try again. That's pretty exciting don't you think?


I'm going to be quite personal in today's blog post. I generally go with the notion of 'never air your laundry in public' but today, I kind of am. I'm going to do it in the most classy way I can and I'm doing it with reflection and learning in mind, not spite or malice. 

Last year, I fell for a man. He was charismatic and charming and told me all the things my broken heart yearned to hear. He promised me the world and perhaps foolishly, I believed he would give me it. At the time, I felt like I loved him. Looking back with fresh eyes I'm not sure I did but during those months, it felt so incredibly real. 

I made plans. I imagined our live together. I spent hours talking to him, we had trips together and days out and talked of this amazing future. I felt like we were on the same wavelength and wanted the same things in life. We had similar energies and bounced off each other creatively. 

But, he lied. He lied about big things. He lied to me and he lied to other people. I knew he did but instead of being smart and walking away, I thought it would change or that I would change him. I think it was probably selfish to cling on to that hope. It was selfish because I thought I could have what I wanted- the dream he promised me. Deep down, very very deep down, I knew I couldn't. 

As time went on, I realised this man didn't love me. He might have said he did and thought he did, but his actions told me he didn't. 

Fortunately for us both, everything stopped at the end of 2015. No more daily chats, no more trips, no more fun days, no more presents to my house, no more anything. 

It was painful and hard and came at a time where I felt very vulnerable and rubbish but truly, was a blessing. I had just started my counselling and had just started to want for a life as just Team Louise&Darcy (he was never a part of D's life but in my head I imagined that one day he would be) and quickly and steadily, I got over it all. Zero contact, nothing on social media, life picked up. Things got good again.

From time to time, I thought about him. I thought about how hurt I was to have been lied to and let down and how when I allowed myself to be in another relationship, I would make sure it was with a man who cherished me and wanted me (and yay now I am!). 

For a good part of a year, I thought I was going to have an amazing thing. When I came to my senses and realised I might not, instead of accepting it, I carried on thinking, hoping, working towards it happening. I wasted my time. Sometimes you cannot change things. Sometimes the world doesn't work how you want it to and the best thing you can do is say, 'OK, I will manage, I will find a new path'. I wish I had done that sooner last year. 

This weekend I saw the man in question and thought, 'what a difference a year makes'. I looked at him and instead of seeing the guy I thought was made just for me, I just saw a guy. 

Letting go takes courage and I'm glad all those months ago I found it because life is so beautiful now. 

I hope if any of you are going through anything similar that you can find the courage to make the right choice. It's often hard to tell whether you should stick and work at something or when it's time to move on but think hard on it and you'll know. I'm sending you big loves if you are confused and scared, I've been there. Once you let go of the exhausting exercise of trying to change the unchangeable, you are free. It's incredibly liberating feeling to just accept a situation and move on, let go and carry on with your life. Anybody can do it, even if you think you can't. 

I'd like to add, to the guy who was what he was, I wish no ill fate. I hope he lives a lovely life and finds his own peace because I've found mine and it's bliss. 

Bit of a deep one this week and definitely a more personal story than I'd usually go for but I thought it might be valuable for someone out there who is also struggling to see that even with some of the hardest things at the hardest times, you can get through, accept you cant change a thing and come out so much happier than you thought you can. 

Toodlepip Glitterbugs!

xx

44 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing this, I feel like I really needed to hear this at the moment & I'm so please that you've moved on to find a happier place x

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    Replies

    1. (How i got my husband back)

      My husband and i have live together for 15yrs and married for 11yrs and he divorce me 3months ago. I was worried and so confuse because i love him so much and i need him back home, i was really going too depressed and it has affect me so much that i feel my life have come to an end. One day a friend of mine told me about this spell caster called Dr Kala who can help me get my husband back and she told me many people are talking about him all over the internet and she gave me his email (kalalovespell@gmail.com) i contact him and i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come back to the house. I have never in my life believe in spell but now he has just helped me out to be a fulfill woman and i am now so happy. All Thanks to DR KALA and if you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his email again is KALALOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM or you whatsapp him on +2347051705853 i am so happy to testify of your work and kindness.

      Delete
  2. Thanks for sharing, I'm sure this will help others in that position. So glad you're in a happier place now. :-) xxx

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  3. Eek, been there, done that, for a year and a half. Was in a stupid haze and when you come out of it you just feel like going back in time and slapping yourself! Sorry you saw him which I guess was inevitable, I hope you didn't actually bump into him and if you did I hope it wasn't too awks! Love the new snapchat Louise!

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  4. Wow. Thank you for sharing this with us. I can't say I've ever experienced this, but it sounds so painful. I'm glad you're happy x

    Erin | beingerin.com

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  5. Glad you have found a well deserved happier place now. x

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  6. Much much love, loving Motivational Mondays! God bless you greatly... LOve from Uruguay.

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  7. So much love for you! Thanks for sharing this, you are so brave to talk about this and I wish nothing but happiness for you (& Darcy!!) but I'm so glad you're happier now! :)

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  8. So brave for talking about this Louise, it just shows how strong you are to move on and and continue with your life xx
    www.blossomofhope.blogspot.com

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  9. Hey Louise, I'm really glad you've shared this story. I went through an identical experience a couple years ago, where I kept catching my ex boyfriend in lies, and kept thinking he would change. It wasn't until all the lies unraveled (as they all eventually do) that I found the strength to walk away. I realized that walking away wasn't "giving up" or weakness or a failure on my part. There just wasn't any good in the relationship, and above all, his actions revealed selfishness and a lack of care for me on his part. I've promised myself to never be with someone again who doesn't treasure me, and who isn't 100% honest. People who lie all the time are deeply insecure and it's not my (or our) job to fix these people. Anyway, just wanted to say from a random internet stranger, on the off chance that you read this, that your post really touched. I'm really happy that you've Met someone who sounds like he is respectful and supports you, and while I'm still searching for that kind of love, your story has given me hope.

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  10. Sometimes, when we just need to feel loved, we unfortunately accept it in away form it comes, even when it's not real. I'm glad you don't beat yourself up over it anymore and I'm even more happy that you recognized that the only person you can change is you, and you're all you need.

    If anyone would like to share their story regarding this or other topics, we're always willing to share our platform. Our goal is to help inform and empower a generation of ambitious young adults and help them deal with any pain or issues so they can lead healthy lives and put great work out into the world. Get in touch. @launch_ya

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  11. You're incredibly brave Louise. I'm sure there are lot's of people who have been in your situation and I think it's great you can share your experiences to help others :) x

    vickysteabreak.co.uk

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  12. I don't "know" you but can't help but be really proud of you for seeing your worth and being strong even though letting go of something you thought would be perfect would have been so incredibly hard. I think we've all felt that feeling to some extent, whether it's purely an unrequited love or to have been led on by the other person in the situation as you clearly were. Either way I'm so pleased you've found someone who respects and cherishes you and also that you're in a good enough place to share this experience with all your readers because it might just be that little kick up the butt someone else needs to make the same difficult but positive decision.

    xx

    www.rafflesbizarre.blogspot.com

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  13. Thank you for sharing this part of your life with us, Louise! It must have been a really tough period for you back then :( I'm really happy that you have now found someone who is worthy of your love and time :) Thank you for showing and inspiring us that we can all find our true happiness one day, even if some of us might take a little longer time than others! :) x

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  14. Louise, thank you for sharing this. I went through something, not quite the same but the same in a way that I didn't know what to do and I couldn't walk away. I met my (ex) boyfriend when I was young and vulnerable at the age of 17. He, like the guy you had trouble with, told me what I wanted to hear. I stuck with this guy for 2.5 years and I hate myself for it. I finally saw the light when he did something to me whilst I was sleeping and told him to stop or I would leave. He continued and in the end I stopped staying at his house. He left me when I told him I was pregnant. I saw him once since he left and that was in ASDA, he looked at me and walked away. I have since then realised that what he did to me, the disrespectful disgusting things he did, were in fact not my fault and he led me to believe he was a good person. I hate myself for staying with him, knowing that he was crushing me and making me feel awful, I hate myself. The only good thing to come from that relationship is my little boy. Thank you fir sharing, Louise. We aren't alone in this world and when bad things happen, even though it might not seem like it at the time, remember there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

    Much love

    Natalie xx

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  15. Thanks for sharing Louise, it must have been a really tough time for you then.Sometimes we just want to feel loved and it's hard to let go. You're so brave to talk about this experience and I'm so glad that you have gotten over it and are in a better position now.
    I wish you and Darcy all the best!
    Much love xox

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  16. Thanks for sharing this Louise, you are so strong and inspiring, glad you have found Mr. Right now xx
    http://art-love-fashion.blogspot.com.au/

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  17. Thank you for sharing your experience, Louise. You are so strong and brave to put it all out there, and I'm so happy that you're happy with someone again now! I did the same thing with my ex, thought I could change his and ways, put up with the disrespect and made excuses for his lies - and I stuck it out for 4 years. It was hard and it still hurts now a few months on, but I know that no contact and time will heal. He's moved on now and in a way I'm jealous that I haven't also found my 'bliss' yet, but I also think that I need to spend time on 'me' for now, work on my self-esteem and spend time with my lovely friends. Wishing you and Darcy lots of love :) xxx

    www.madeleineslittleblog.blogspot.co.uk

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  18. Beautiful words xx

    Taryn | TheFuss.co.uk

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  19. Thank you for sharing this. It came at a time I needed some helful advice on a similar situation I'm going through! xxx

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  20. I really needed this! After just dropping out of university because of my mental health, I'm in need of so much motivation!

    www.thomascrawshaw.co.uk

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  21. Hi everyone! So excited my husband is back after a break up !
    My husband broke up with me last week, i was so frustrated and i could not know what next to do again, i love my husband so much but he was cheating on me with another woman and this makes him broke up with me so that he can be able to get marry to the other lady and this lady i think use witchcraft on my husband to make him hate me and my kids and this was so critical and uncalled-for,I cry all day and night for God to send me a helper to get back my man until i went to NY to see a friend and who was having the same problem with me but she latter got her Husband back and i asked her how she was able to get her husband back and she told me that their was a powerful spell caster in Africa name Dr.Unity that he help with love spell in getting back lost lover back, and i decided to contacted the same Dr.Unity and he told me what is needed to be done for me to have my man back and i did it although i doubted it but i did it and the Dr told me that i will get the result after 48hours, and he told me that my husband was going to call me by 9pm in my time and i still doubted his word, to my surprise my husband really called me and told me that he miss me so much, Oh My God! i was so happy, and today i am happy with my man again and we are joyfully living together as one good family and i thank the powerful spell caster Dr.Unity of Unityspelltemple@gmail.com , he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that good spell casters still exist and Dr.Unity is one of the good spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are there and your lover is turning you down, or you have your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore contact the powerful spell caster Dr.Unity on his email: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com .if you have any problem contact Dr.Unity, I guarantee you that he will help you. Thank you sooooo much Dr Unity.

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  22. Thank you for these words Louise. Yesterday I left my boyfriend. I feel so empty and lonely, but I need to take care of myself. I cannot be patient anymore for someone to get better at loving me and I cannot beg him to love me anymore. Although it is so very hard to realize that he is not going to change and that we had different views of our future together, you have to ask yourself whether or not this situation makes you happy. I am so sad because I now think I have wasted three years of hoping something good would come out of it, and the hardest part of it is seeing your wishes and dreams crumble. What is also hard is all of a sudden being alone. I love my friends, but the feeling when you come home in the evening and there's noone to talk to about your day, noone to laugh with and noone to share things with, is so depressing and sad. I know i have to be my best friend right now and take good care of me, and stop thinking about the past and how things could have been. Despite all of it, I still wish he would hold me and let me cry in his arms... :(

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  23. Although i have never truly feel of what you had been going through, somehow I feel relatable to your story in certain events in my life. Hesitation is evil as sometimes I am confuse wether to just stay and wait something to happen or get over it and move on.

    http://thesoulpapers.blogspot.my/

    ReplyDelete
  24. Although i have never truly feel of what you had been going through, somehow I feel relatable to your story in certain events in my life. Hesitation is evil as sometimes I am confuse wether to just stay and wait something to happen or get over it and move on.

    http://thesoulpapers.blogspot.my/

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  26. Without Dr.Zabaza there will not be hope for any one that is heart broken, My love life has been a living hell since the departure of my lover from me. I was lonely that faithful day and i decided to keep myself busy online that was when i read an article about Dr.Zabaza which convince me to contact Dr.Zabaza through these details +2348182620374 and zabaza.logan@yahoo.com that were on the article. And through these process my lover that has left me for a long time came back within matters of hours that i contacted Dr.Zabaza.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm happy for you, Louise(: May your life be filled with more happy happenings! 2016 looks pretty good so far (from the vlogs cuz that's all I know) and I wish you and Darcy well~

    - Mei

    ReplyDelete

  28. (How i got my husband back)

    My husband and i have live together for 15yrs and married for 11yrs and he divorce me 3months ago. I was worried and so confuse because i love him so much and i need him back home, i was really going too depressed and it has affect me so much that i feel my life have come to an end. One day a friend of mine told me about this spell caster called Dr Kala who can help me get my husband back and she told me many people are talking about him all over the internet and she gave me his email (kalalovespell@gmail.com) i contact him and i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come back to the house. I have never in my life believe in spell but now he has just helped me out to be a fulfill woman and i am now so happy. All Thanks to DR KALA and if you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his email again is KALALOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM or you whatsapp him on +2347051705853 i am so happy to testify of your work and kindness.

    ReplyDelete
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  30. Unimaginable and unbelievable. I am Ruth from the United States and i have a good news to share to the entire world. Do you need your ex husband or lover urgently? I wanna tell you that you need not to worry because i have a good news for those out there that are faced or similar to such situation because there is always a hope and a solution to all problem. There is a great spell caster called Dr Ogudugu who can really solve all your problems. Getting my lover back is what i can't imagine but when I was losing Jeff, I needed help and somewhere to turn badly but my Cousin told me about this spell caster who also helped her on the internet. I thought it won't work but i just tried to give this man a chance and i ordered a LOVE SPELL. Two days later, my phone rang. Jeff was his old self again and wanted to come back to me! Not only come back, This is truly miraculous and the spell caster opened him up to know how much I love and needs him. This Spell Casting isn’t brainwashing, but he opened up his eyes to know how much love we have to share together. I recommend anyone who is in my old situation to try him because he will help you and make things be the way it ought to be. If you have such problem or similar to this, please contact him on his email: greatogudugu@gmail.com thank you Dr Ogudugu in fact you are miraculous and may your gods ever reward you for your good deeds..Call +2348142250751

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  32. Hello! What to do if you lost your boyfriend or girlfriend? I'm Maria 21 yr old from England, my boyfriend of a 4yr just broke up with me and am 30 weeks pregnant.I have cried my self to sleep most of the nights and don’t seem to concentrate during lectures sometimes I stay awake almost all night thinking about him and start to cry all over again.Because of this I end up not having energy for my next day’s classes ,my attendance has dropped and am always in uni and on time.Generally he is a very nice guy ,he ended it because he said we were arguing a lot and not getting along.He is right we’ve been arguing during the pregnancy a lot .After the break up I kept ringing him and telling him I will change.I am in love with this guy and he is the best guy I have ever been with.I’m still hurt and in disbelief when he said he didn’t have any romantic feelings towards me anymore that hurt me faster than a lethal syringe.He texts me now and then mainly to check up on how am doing with the pregnancy,he is supportive with it but it’s not fair on me, him texting me as I just want to grieve the pain and not have any stress due to the pregnancy.i was really upset and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a spell for me. 28 hours later, my bf came to me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. I and my bf are living together happily again.. All thanks to Dr Unity. If you need a spell caster that can cast a spell that truly works, I suggest you contact him. He will not disappoint you. Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on whats-app: +2348071622464

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete

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  39. Should you ever require the services of a hacker, i implore you to try your very best to hire only professionals. hackintechnology@gmail.com will increase your chances of getting your job completed. i was able to hire the services of an elite, asides the fact that i was provided a permanent solution to the service he rendered me but he gave a very efficient customer experience. he carried me along with every process and didnt leave me in the dark. contact him via email/phone hackintechnology@gmail.com 13057712040

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  40. Till the day i die March 14th is the day that i will never let go. This is the day Akpe a trust worthy spell caster gave me my love back after two month my newly wedded husband left me for another girl . My name is Foudy MacMillan and I am married to Tommy MacMillan . My husband is a caring man at least he use to be until he left me for another,though he’s still the most caring man ever . We have been sweet heart since the second year of senior high school . I have never and will never love any body else . We got married on the first of august 2006 and it was beautiful . That day the smile he wore on his face was the bestever. He was so sweet and seeing him happy made my heart skip . We where happily married with great love until he started working with a bewitched girl at Google Inc . He started coming home late say was having a couple of drinks with work mate . He was at least honest with me,cos I knew who the bi**h was i even made friends with her based on the fact that she was my husband friend . I was too blind to see what a dog she was until it was too late thanks to Akpe that help me . Even before i came to know of Akpe, Other fake spellers has taken my money without results. It all started making sense few hours later I cried my heart out thank to my best friend was always there for me , she gave me strength to keep going on . I needed him back but had no idea here as i was zero and dont know what to do as he was moving on with that witch girl but on my own i have the faith that I wasn’t going to let go of this one . I was fully aware of love spell but base on the fact that the ones i came across could not give me results after spending almost $7900. But again i went further to search for a good and best spell caster I found Online and tried Akpe of Osilma temple and his spell and got my heart desire in just 48 hours which was so unreal but was real. I told him my sad story and all he said on the phone was that my heart desire must be meant though I paid for the cost of materials used for the spell . He said he was going to make him a slave in love with me literally speaking . And he also told me that my husband will come back to me attacking me with a lip lock kiss apologizing on the third of April this year thus there was no need for me to look for him . when he finished preparing the spell with the materials I paid for,after two days he sent through DHL a parcel containing the spell and some enchanting word which he told me how to use . He told me right after i use what he gave me my love will run back to me and on the 10th i received the parcel then i used the content to finish the last stage myself . I concluded it 11:30 at night on the 12st of april 2017 and just as said my husband will return, it happened . It brought me so much joy and happiness . when the bi**h found out she tried to play the victim but it was rather too late cos he was now my thanks to Akpe spell . I Know he is honest and truthful he can help you with anything . Seeking the same? contact Akpe Osilama on / chiefpriestakpeosilamaspellcast@yahoo.com

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  41. Hello everyone, my name is Kate and I want to recommend a reliable hacker who helped hack my husband's cell phone remotely.

    Which gave me full access to all his texts and, and now he has nothing to hide from me. If you require his service, contact ghosthacker2351@gmail.com, tell him Kate referred you he'll help.

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  42. hi guys…. Amazing love spell that work fast
    I was having a great love for the past 7 months I know him for 2 yrs he had all bad habbits but wen he got interest over me he left evrythg jus for me and just to be happy he took care of me like my mother.. I was very much blessed the problem was I had three family frd (boys) I am very close to them…. my boy didn’t like me talking to those boys he didn’t tell me tht first he was always afraid that I would leave him… so he kept his fear inside his heart and was worrying a lot.. fa 4 months now wen I came to know tht he zz hving this feari decided to stop talking with everyone, but my boy is telling me tht he lost his pure love on me.. he is telling me tht he loves me but not like before I begged him very badly… for 8 days I cried and begged him….. v both are very close…. v are mutually into evrythg even sex…. now he zz telling tht he is tired of fear and he can’t be like before frdzz what should I do? what should I do to get him back? plz tell me i found online who help me to get back with my boy again he is back to me again with his real pure love all thank to Dr happy the real spell caster who help me out when i was in pain and tear plz contact him http://happyspelltemple.webs.com/ for more details email.....happylovespell2@gmail.com or add him on whats-app +2348133873774

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Sprinkleofglitter xxx

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