The Everyday Mundane || Monday Insights #5

Aloha Sprinklerinos,

Happy Monday to you! The start of a new week to turn over a new leaf and achieve your goals.

If you are confused as to what this feature is, hop on over to THE ORIGINAL POST where you can fill yourself in.

The topic for this week is -

The Everyday Mundane

What are the dynamics between you, Matt &  Darcy in everyday life? Do you ever worry you are spending too little time with one or the other or do YOU ever feel left out when they are together? I've often wondered if its hard to see your hubby giving lots of love and attention to the other girl in his life sometimes.

The dynamics in our family are quite traditional I think. I'm more feminine in my behaviour than Matt and am all about choosing her outfits and putting clips in her hair and Matt loves to take her to parks and on walks and do outdoorsy things. It's only ever wonderful to see Darcy and Matt get on so well. He is as much her parent as I am and plays an equal role in her life. It brings me joy to see them together. Smoosh-tastic answer there! 

I´ve always wondered what your opinion on feminism is? Because you seem like a really girly person with lots of glitter and pink in your life, and have you ever thought about that it might contribute to the "girly" society (you know that a girl is so petite and fragile and oh so weak, they only wear pink and they poop glitter etc). And you seem to dress Darcy very girly too, I´m not at all saying it´s a bad thing, it´s your own choice of course! I was just curious if your doing a deliberate choice, for example dressing Darcy in almost always pink(ish) and not so much "boyish" clothes? 

What a good question! My stance on feminism is this - it's about choice. I choose to be girly and wear pink and dress Darcy in a similar fashion and I am free to make those choices. If another Mother chose to dress her Daughter in more unisex or masculine clothes then I would respect her because she is making her own choices. I think the problem arises when women are forced to make choices or settle for options they are not happy with or that are out of their hands. I want Darcy to grow into a woman who can make her own free decisions and choose a life that pleases her and makes her happy. I want my little girl not to think that looking like a barbie doll is important but to place value on strength of character, good values and high morals. If we choose to do those things whilst wearing clothes that make us feel nice, then I don't think that's a bad thing. 

Choice and free will are key. At the moment Darcy is 2 so I make her choices but once she is old enough, we can reassess and go from there. 

Do you ever feel as if your life is becoming very monotonous and repetitive? What do you do when feeling like this? I know you must appreciate having Darcy and Matt and that you "love the small things in life" but do you ever just want to drive to see Zoe for a week and not have to worry about anything?

There are absolutely times when I would love to just jump in my car, fill up with petrol and drive off on my own and do whatever I like, but the facts are I can't do that. When I chose to get married and planned our family I knew that I would loose a certain amount of freedom and frankly, it's crap. I wish you could still be as carefree and adventurous. I do love the little things in life and I do obviously love having my family but yes, things can become repetitive. When I feel like that I plan mini adventures for myself. It's easy for me to go to London for a day or do things that don't involve overnight stays so I just have a lot of fun doing them. If I want to go away for a week (like for Playlist or Vidcon) I have to ask my inlaws if they will stay and help Matt with Darcy and basically, if they can't, I can't go. Fortunately they always jump at the chance of some baby-time (as they live far away and don't see her very much) so everyone is usually a winner. Lucky me!

How did you manage to keep track of homework when you were at school? I always get sidetracked and procrastinate and end up not doing well on the homework. How to manage those things now, like your youtube? 

Basically I didn't. I was rubbish at writing things down and was often in a pickle. I would advise you to get a homework diary and use it religiously, no matter how time consuming or boring it is. Nowadays I have a notes on my phone that I use or jot things down each day to remind me to do certain tasks. Saying that, I'm writing this in a hurry on a Saturday night because Zoe will shortly be here and I should've done this on Friday morning!

My boyfriend and I just got a place and it will be available later in the week. We are furnishing it ourselves and while we have a few days I'm already thinking about the dishes to buy how to style the place. He's pretty simple, and I'm very into modern, fashionable, current things. What's a great way to blend the two and how did you and Matt do it?

Erm I'm afraid I can be no help here because I just insisted on what I wanted and didn't back down! Haha! Matt is really easy going and just doesn't care, so that helps. He has a couple of rooms in the house (woah, rooms I haven't filmed in!!) that are completely his and he has decorated to his style so he is pleased with his 'man space' and I'm pleased with my girly bedroom. Sorry I couldn't help you more. 

What are some of Darcy's favourite games to play with you and Matt?

Darcy loves to play hide and seek (she always hides behind the lounge door), story books (where we read it to her and then she reads it to us), kitchens (where she makes us invisible food and we say how delicious it was) and babies. 

What is you favourite part of your day to day life? and how is it different to your "Youtube days" so to speak?

My favourite part of 'home life' is when Matt gets home from work, cooks dinner and we all just play together and mooch about. Then he puts Darcy to bed and I can hear him reading a story and I feel realllllyyyy relaxed. My 'YouTube days' are entirely different. They are very go go go and exciting. None are the same (as you may have seen from my vlogs) and they are full of a lot of laughter. I love having both kinds of days and enjoy the balance it brings me. 

What's your favorite thing to snack on?

All the things I shouldn't! Bad Louise. 

I want to ask, what are the house chores you, well, aren't too skilled at? for me it's definitely cooking! and which ones come easily to you?

House chores I enjoy are cleaning the kitchen and hoovering. The ones I HATE and am rubbish at are cooking and keeping on top of laundry. I'm over run by clothes!

Is it sometime difficult to have a job (I think it is your job hope I am not wrong!!!) Involving staying at home all day and not having any contact with colleagues or a boss etc? 

it's not difficult  but there are certainly days I would like a bit of company. On those days I just ring friends, go on Skype or arrange to visit someone. For all the downsides my job has, there are a hundred up sides :)

Do you cook or you prefer eating in a restaurant/have your food delivered/cooked by someone else on daily bases? If you cook, do you cook different food for Darcy?

I don't cook unless I absolutely must and when I do it's a shambles. I can just about microwave soup. Matt cooks all our dinners (I can make little lunches for me and Darcy of course) but we quite often eat out. Darcy is well behaved (mostly) in restaurants and we enjoy the social aspect of it. Most Friday nights we have our good friends Mark and Clare round and we have takeaway. Mmmm fooooood. 

Do you have a huge amount of glittery things in your home?

Hahaha yes! So many! I'm like a magpie. Anything that shimmers or twinkles catches my eye and I just think it's so beautiful. I never understand people who don't like glitter because really, look at it! It's mesmerising. If I could paint every wall in the house glittery and have sparkly carpet I totally would. 

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And that's us done for this week's Monday Insights. I hope some of that was new information or something you enjoyed reading. Next week is going to be the last in this year's feature (I'll bring it back for 2014) and the topic will be - 

EDUCATION YOUNG AND OLD

This is your chance to ask anything you like about nursery, school, collage, uni, adult learning course and everything inbetween. I will accept questions up until Thursday night and look forward to seeing what comments you leave!

Toodlepip!

xx

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Autumn Playmates

Aloha Sprinklerinos,

With Autumn in full swing we have taken to fully embracing it and being out and about as much as possible. Last week we took our friend's two beautiful Daughter's and Darcy to our local park for a bit of an explore and a run about. 

It was so lovely watching Baby Glitter interact with other children and let go of my hand to pursue her own interests. Granted she wasn't going far but it was interesting to see what she wanted to do when she could make her own choices (instead of me guiding her). 

We are really thankful to have such sweet little friends in our lives and look forward to more days like this before it gets really really cold!

What kind of things do you like to do with little ones in the Autumn. I'm all ears for activity suggestions!

Toodlepip!

xx

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Motherhood || Monday Insights #4

Aloha Sprinklerinos,

Oops, I'm a little late to my own party aren't I? Apologies for that, I was prioritising. Despite telling myself off numerous times this year for allowing myself to stress so much over various things, it's not a personality trait I can change over night so I'm working on it. It was really hard to tell myself to keep the macbook closed and go to lunch with a friend or take a much needed nap, but for doing it I feel so much better.  So, here we have it, a Monday feature on a Tuesday. Heavens above! Will the world stop turning? No. Do I need to worry about this? No. Good. Glad we're all settled then haha!

If you have no idea what's going on or where you are, THIS POST explains what this feature is all about and might be worth a gander.

This week, our topic was- 

MOTHERHOOD. 

What books/websites/blogs would you recommend to a first time pregnant 26 yr old?

When I was pregnant I absolutely loved the babycentre.co.uk because it is full to the brim with brilliant resources, as well as the book 'What to expect when you're expecting' and a book Mylene Klass wrote about her pregnancy with her first baby, Ava. I now always feel very connected to her because i feel like I shared my pregnancy with her which is a little weird haha. 

I want to be a mother when I grow up but I'm terrified of the pain that comes with giving birth. Should I let it scare me out of having my own baby or am I imagining it worse than it really is?

Personally, I don't think you should let it scare you out of having a child when the time is right for you. Yes, it is very painful and yes, it's everything you see it as on TV, but then you are a mother forever. You have created new life and made the most amazing thing. Think of all the days you will be alive and then deduct 1-3 for labour and childbirth. It's worth it. 

I know about most of the changes to your body after pregnancy (ie boobies, weight gain, etc.) but how goes it "downtown"? How long does it take to recover? I know it can't be the same as pre-baby but is sex super different? SO AWKWARD!

Haha I feel weird about answering this but I'd tell my girlfriends so why not tell the internet? If you have a natural birth (like I did) then a few weeks. I had stitches so definitely a good few weeks/a couple of months. As for 'doowwwnnntooowwwnn' (and please God don't let me dad ever read this now we're talking about my sex life- ew)- everything is absolutely 100% fine. Without being really graphic, if I were to sleep with a new man (calm down, I'm not gonna), he wouldn't know I'd had a child. I can't feel ANY difference and nor can Matt. Happy days. Don't worry about it at all. Your body is magical. 

Were there ever times during pregnancy where you really struggled and wanted it all over with? If yes, how did you cope with those feelings?

If you mean wanted my pregnancy over and for the baby to be born, yes. Toward the end I was very fed up with being so huge and tired and just wanted my body back. I coped by knowing it would soon all happen. If you mean 'over' as in not have a pregnancy or baby at all then I didn't feel that way but my advice to anyone who does would be to contact their midwife and talk their feelings through. 

What were some of the things that maybe overwhelmed you about pregnancy/having a child, and what would you say to yourself beforehand to prepare or inform yourself? 

This is tricky because I still feel a bit overwhelmed or under prepared sometimes. Things that overwhelm me are mainly practical. Like is she getting the right nutrition, am I stimulating her mind enough with learning play, is she tall/heavy/strong enough etc. If you feel the same way, I can't tell you how mind-resting it is to go to your health visitor or dr. We recently went to ours and I had 30 minutes to talk about all the things I was fretting over and so she gave Darcy a good check and she was absolutely fine. I think as Mother's/carers/guardians we worry so much about things we perhaps don't need to but it's part of what makes us a mother. If you didn't worry at all, I'm not sure that would be a perfect thing either. Take solice in the knowledge that you are not alone. 

What was your biggest worry when you found out you were pregnant?

I worried that I would miscarry as it is such a common occurrence. 

Has the fact that you lost your mother young affected the way you are with your daughter? Was that a difficult thing to handle? I ask because I grew up without a father and I am afraid it will be difficult for me to be a parent when I lacked one. 

I can completely understand why you are asking this question. In short, yes, it does effect the way I behave as a Mother. Since my Mother died when I was quite young (7), I can't quite imagine what 'being mothered' feels like and so worried I wouldn't know how to take on the role. I look at other daughters and mothers and can't feel what they feel or understand their bond. I remember feeling very loved and cherished by my Mum but I can't imagine what that would feel like now. Would it be the same as mine and my Dad's bond but more feminine? Would it be like having an unconditional best friend? Would it be ever so comforting? You tell me. 

What I do know is this. I wish desperately that I could have a mother who makes me feel worthy, wanted, safe, loved and special. Because those are all the things I would want for myself, I will give them all to my daughter in abundance. To me, that is what a Mother is. 

Think of what qualities you miss from not having your Father around and apply them to your own parenting when the time comes. I think you'll do a great job. 

How do you tell your friends nicely that baby talk isn't interesting to you without hurting anyone's feelings?

Hmmmmm I think you're walking a thin line there. If you tell them you aren't interested they will be quite offended. Why not try and steer the conversation away gently and get them interested in something else for a few minutes or arrange to do something sans baby? Would you be able to ask the Dad/Grandparents to babysit whilst you and your friends have a night out or go shopping or have lunch? 

Failing that you could always try to be subtle and turn it back on yourself. Like, 'Ooohh I wish I had a baby too sometimes so I could be a bit more involved in these conversations. Sometimes it's a bit hard to imagine how you feel and what your life is like'. That way you're giving your point but not pinning any blame on them or making them feel bad (even if the wishing you had a baby might be a little white lie). Good luck!

Do you think going on nights out and things like that with your significant other is more fun and exciting before or after motherhood?

Errrm yes and no. Before motherhood you have no ties to things and you are free to be hungover the next day or come back late and not care. Once you have a child you need to be back to relieve the babysitter or you want to avoid feeling like a badgers backside after a few too many cocktails! Saying that though, because time alone with your significant other is so rare after motherhood, it's quite a novelty so you do enjoy it more than before. 

Since becoming a mummy are there any special life lessons you have learnt, as a result of raising Darcy?

Not yet but I've only been in the role 2 years so we'll see what crops up. Obviously I've learnt to put someone else before myself and to be a lot more loving and responsible but I think every parent feels that way so couldn't really say they are special to me life lessons. I'll keep you updated. 

I'd like to know if you're the kind of girl who knows what she's gonna name her child..and what made you pick Darcy? (I don't know if that's outta context, I'm just curious!)

Before I even met Matt I had chosen my baby names. I was all set when I was pregnant and had my heart set on a few things. Then, the day we got the results of the gender scan, we were driving home from dinner with my Dad and Matt said, 'What about 'Darcy'?' and it just hit me, 'That is my Daughter's name'. I can even remember the exact bit of road we were on and the exact way the sun was setting over the fields when I was hit with such certainty that Darcy would be her name. We have already decided on a girl's name for when we have another baby but boy's names are still up in the air!

What is the most gratifying part of being a mother?

Being a family. I now have my up, my down and my side to side (Dad, Darcy, Matt and my sister) and feel very secure and happy. Darcy completed that for us and we love watching her grow and be such a huge part of our lives. Awwww (feel free to be a bit sick at that).

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And that's all folks! I really enjoyed answering some of your questions and look forward to what you ask for next week. I think there are only going to be 2 more Monday Insights this year, so if you do want to ask something, make sure you get it in this week or next. 

Monday Insights #5 will be.... DAY TO DAY LIFE.

This is your chance to ask anything you like about the humdrum, mundane, daily bits and bobs that we get up to in Glitter World. If there is any small thing you have ever wondered, this is the time to ask it!

Toodlepip!

xx

To find new ways to stalk me or learn about my disclosure policy, click HERE. 

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